We aren't psychiatrists, so please don't even try to go there.
Also, even in divorces, the lawyers are the ones that get the money, not the litigants. You're not alone on that score.
So, what is the debt level now, and what type of debt is it? Credit cards? Student loans? Child support payments?
Give us a rough breakdown of the debt. There is very little we can do to help unless we know what the situation is. Please be as specific as you can without giving away your personal details. Let us know when these debts went into default and who the original creditor might be. Also tell us what state you live in...it's important because contract law is a state matter, not a federal on. Do you have any judgement against you? Are any law suits pending? Are the creditors hounding or are the collection agents of junk-debt buyer?
All of us here have been in situations like yours and have survived, even gotten ourselves out of the hole and gotten our lives back on the important things...like living them.
Start your reading here with the FlyingIFR Method which you can find here:
http://www.debtorboards.com/index.php/topic,7211.0.htmlRead it a couple of times and then think about it for a day or two. Then read it again.
Don't be afraid to ask questions. But remember we cannot be your lawyer. You'll have to do it yourself or go hire yourself one. Most of us here have found that with some dedication to the research and being pointed in the right direction, we haven't needed the added expense of legal counsel.
The election to declare bankruptcy Chapter 13 BK puts a five-year monkey on your back. It is a choice that only you can make for yourself. It may or may not be a good idea depending upon what your situation actually is.
But, unless there is a foreclosure goon breathing down your neck, there is no rush to get into BK. You have the time to think it through, and, I hope, that we can get you some of the confidence you need in yourself to take the time to do the thinking. We can be pretty rough on you if you don't want to face the facts, but that roughness has its reason. If you can't face the facts, there is little that we can do.
Be patient. It takes time to get yourself in tune with a new way of looking at things, which can be summed but as these are all matters of BUSINESS, not personal worth.
Ask questions if you get bogged down. Everyone does at some point, we're here to get you back on the right tracks.
